Jan 27, 2014

Monday Confession

I like rules, order, structure.
This is probably why I was successful at WeightWatchers and Adkins.
Both told me exactly what to eat, or how many of what to eat.

For the last year I've been lowcarb, staying under 50grams of carbs a day. Easy rule to follow and I'm in a groove with eating the exact same things everything. I honestly don't mind this, however....I think this is my downfall because I have a confession.

I am not eating enough.

And it doesn't work anymore.  The entire year of 2013 I really didn't show a weight loss on the scale. Sure I fluctuated three to five pounds but no matter how hard I worked out and ran or didn't...it made no difference.  I guess eating less than 1200 calories a day will do that.

Those 1200 calories are perfectly fine for a non-workout day, right?
But for those who have following or just jumped in, you will notice that I work out twice a day 5days a week, and now with my HRM and Polar Loop I have a more scientific approximation of my burns and whatnot.

1200 calories intake
minus 600-900 calories
results in bumpkiss.


I know this.
I'm not posting this for anything other than to share that I'm going to be in research mode to figure out what is an appropriate balance (macros) for me.  I'm working out 90minutes a day and running up to 22-25miles a week.  I actually got a distance record on Friday night of 6.5miles, and then I felt horrible that my polar was saying I burned another 800 calories making my TDEE plus workouts a total of 3000 calories, yet I only ate 1500 (I forced myself to eat), which essentially means I was in the hole 1500 calories just for the one day.

I've tried adding in protein shakes to help bump up my intake and protein, but am having trouble finding one that is good for my IBS and lactose intolerance. I was very excited to try the samples of Advocare I had gathered, but I had a very very bad reaction to the chocolate.  I still have a greenberry to try, but honestly I'm scared to react or flare again.  

If anyone has a vegan option to suggest, please, I'm open to it.  

Now here's the screwed up part...
People are complimenting my efforts, noticing weight loss (that is not there!) and remarking on how 'thin' I'm getting.  I am losing inches and yes that is most important, but I know I'm not doing it in a healthy way right now.

Give a girl a compliment and it makes it harder to let the science/health side of the brain take control over the girl with low-self-esteem brain.

If anyone has gone through this, experience with a nutritionist/trainer, or want to point me in a right direction, I am open to suggestions.


  1. Not sure nor do I have any suggestions for you but I think you may be right. Maybe a nutritionist may be the way to go. I usually have a really hard time hitting my calories on any given day much less on a heavy exercise one.

  2. April, are you gaining muscle? This why the scale is not changing but others can see a noticeable difference.

    1. Oh yes! I am gaining muscle, I can see new definition in my legs and my biceps are starting to fill in.
      I guess, I'm just afraid that I'm not going to do this the right way and I cause more damage to my metabolism by eating correctly. Nobody needs a sickly mama (not sickly thin, but a broken immune system or always sick)

      Glad to see you again Nicole!

  3. 1) unless you're REALLY petite, 1200 calories for the amount of exercise you do, it just not enough. i am 5'4 and petite and when i was eating only 1200cals per day, i GAINED weight and it was noticeable around my midsection. i was doing the insanity program and restricting my caloric intake but that was backfiring on me. i also knew it wasn't working because even though i ate, i was hungry like, every hour! so i talked to my friend who is in the health/fitness industry and he said that i was way under my calories. when this happens, your body is burning to much, not getting enough and therefore, it will hold onto the fat! basically, your body goes into starvation mode and will naturally protect itself by holding onto every calorie. i'm not sure if this applies to you but just another thing to consider. when it bumped up my caloric intake to what it should have been (which was 1600 cals per day), i started losing weight and the fat around my midsection went away.

    what i did learn after all of that is that you need to eat to lose weight! i eat a daily caloric intake of 2000cals - i lift heavy weights and hardly do any cardio and i continue to burn fat and gain muscle. don't be afraid to increase you calorie intake; the fitter you get, the more calories your body needs to sustain your muscles/healthy organs.

    Vodka and Soda


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