This morning I got a couple emails and notifications that prompted me to realize maybe my avoiding this place isn't the right method to this madness. In late February I made a conscious decision to put the family and house higher on the priority list. Don't get me wrong, family, especially my kiddos, always trump ALL for me...but with the new house and such, there was room for more attention to them. I thought perhaps I was being slightly selfish with my attention being consumed with working out AND blogging. So both subjects went to the side. Much like the ultra skinny clothes that I once dreamt of getting back into.
This place of semi-public therapy writing was derailed due to work projects and house chaos.
I've honestly missed the commentary, razzing, snarking,
whatever you call it from my like-minded blogpeeps.
You know who you are :)
The truth is I've not been focused on myself as much as before. I'm not running (that's another post) or currently working a challenge, food wise or activity. I'm not experimenting in the kitchen or schedule. So what would interest anyone, hence the hiatus.
I'm not saying I'm back and going full force...but facing the reality of where I am on Tuesday, April 21st. Nearing the end of April (the month...not me!*snort*) and I'm right at the same place I was when I started Wednesday Weigh-Ins in January. No more, no less...but right back at the same place I was four months ago.
A friend has had to smack me around figuratively lately and asked me find a picture of myself at what I think my goal weight is. The magic number that supposedly is going to make my woes magically disappear, right? I remarked 'about 20lbs...I felt awesome around 145.' And she made me find a picture.
|Left - 2008 at 145 Right - 2014 at 160|
And then she made me do my measurements and the reality is that I am still comparable to that girl despite the 20lb difference on the scale. Not exactly, but pretty darn close for six years, one car accident and a baby later.
But I still want to be better.
Happier with myself.